What was the matter with me? I knew how to handle contentious situations like this with patience and focus on problem-solving and community-building. But as I read the emails among the officers in our neighborhood association—I serve as secretary-treasurer—my gut simmered dangerously close to reaching my mouth, bypassing my brain and heart, and splattering across the keyboard of my laptop. Because people were being people. And so was I. That’s what was the matter with me. I was being selfish.. I wanted what I wanted. And so, I went to the Word.

The matter of relating to one another

Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends. Proverbs 17:9

By fostering love in response to an offense sounds as if Solomon is saying, ignore or hide the transgression. Not at all. By offering grace instead of anger, he’s advising discretion to foster repentance and reconciliation. 

Solomon also warns against gossip. Complaining about others’ offenses can feel righteous—self-righteous, blabbing about one person’s shortcomings while exhibiting my own. As Paul wrote in Galatians 6:1, “Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.” 

I was being tempted to transgress as my neighbor had. No small matter on my part.

A matter of relating to God

Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind. Ecclesiastes 12:13

Here Solomon admonishes us to trust and obey God, to fear His judgment. As the author of Hebrews wrote in 4:13, “Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.” The ultimate fear! 

As anger threaten to escape my mouth, I wasn’t fearing God. It was the worldly fears of failure, rejection, the opinion of others, their judgment. And in wanting what I wanted, what I really wanted was to be God.

Ironically, if I feared God in trust and obedience I had nothing to fear, something I’d said precisely a week ago. 

A matter of relating to community

Last Monday evening, I had the honor of being interviewed by Pamela Nichols for her podcast “Healing Words.” Our conversation mostly centered around my memoir Wisdom Builds Her House, which is to say, we talked about faith and how to put obedience and trust into action. Or as Paul wrote, Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, Colossians 3:23.

The root of the matter, which I also about two years ago. So, instead of answering the email, I ate lunch, walked another neighbor’s dogs, and prayed. Then, led by the Spirit, I replied to all with an email of grace to our community of flawed human beings, like me.

And what does the Lord require of you?

Linkup with Five Minute Friday: https://fiveminutefriday.com/2024/09/19/fmf-writing-prompt-link-up-matter/